shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Randomize
