it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
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