If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
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They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
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I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
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