Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
