your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize