I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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