Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize
