I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize