very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Randomize
