i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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