D3 body, D1 cock
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.