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I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
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