Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota

  (415): View more from California

  everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy

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  (415): I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota (415): everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy http://tfl.nu/10ak
  Replies (152) Good night (894) Bad night (3529)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"

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  (210): I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV" http://tfl.nu/w3he
  Replies (37) Good night (5549) Bad night (916)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.

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  (908): Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life. http://tfl.nu/04rm
  Replies (63) Good night (1235) Bad night (5374)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.

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  (904): I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester. http://tfl.nu/arpr
  Replies (9) Good night (1212) Bad night (2905)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.

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  (504): once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead. http://tfl.nu/caf0
  Replies (6) Good night (4188) Bad night (808)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers

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  (615): i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers http://tfl.nu/7wrv
  Replies (5) Good night (3184) Bad night (887)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again

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  (775): FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again http://tfl.nu/fzl1
  Replies (25) Good night (6781) Bad night (1374)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.

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  (401): I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type. http://tfl.nu/97ap
  Replies (4) Good night (2523) Bad night (1035)
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  (979): View more from Texas

  his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.

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  (979): his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible. http://tfl.nu/lobz
  Replies (15) Good night (4180) Bad night (1245)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon

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  (402): You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon http://tfl.nu/n4f7
  Replies (16) Good night (1227) Bad night (753)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun

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  (919): You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun http://tfl.nu/syyf
  Replies (1) Good night (938) Bad night (524)
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  (650): View more from California

  Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.

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  (650): Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some. http://tfl.nu/6y08
  Replies (5) Good night (1834) Bad night (607)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.

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  (914): When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked. http://tfl.nu/4q7m
  Replies (5) Good night (2270) Bad night (508)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.

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  (860): Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage. http://tfl.nu/sckj
  Replies (3) Good night (418) Bad night (793)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there

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  (914): if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there http://tfl.nu/ylqp
  Replies (1) Good night (169) Bad night (280)

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