Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize