he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
