Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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