What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
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