Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize