My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
