I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
