She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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