addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
