why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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