gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
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