There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
