Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Mom said you looked used
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Randomize
