Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
