My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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