rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
