His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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