I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
