onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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