Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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