Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
