I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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