How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
