Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
