He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
