we made out on top of his cat.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂