Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.