do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
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