Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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