have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
