Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i love accidental penises.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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