I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
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