nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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