It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
