? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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