Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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