wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
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