The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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