When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
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I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
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He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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