i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize