its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Damn victory sex feels great
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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